Negative Parentlng of Infants and Toddlers Increases Aggression

Results of a new research study of more than 260 mothers and their children, followed from birth until first grade, were published by University of Minnesota this week. Before the study, researchers believed that the combination of the temperament of the infant and negative parenting, particularly in the toddler phase (think terrible two’s) would put kids at risk for behavior problems when they went to school. They were surprised to find that negative parenting in early infancy mattered most.

So what exactly is negative parenting? Negative parenting is emotionally overreactive discipline and rough handling by the parent. When the baby needs something or is upset, crying or screaming, the caregiver responds with anger, frustration and upset rather than a more calm measured response. Since mothers, particularly those of toddlers, are confronted with lots of unpleasant child behavior, they need education and tools to manage their own strong feelings BEFORE the baby comes. If not, the researchers found, conflict only worsened over time.

Negative parenting in infancy sets the stage for both moms and their babies to be more hostile and angry during the toddler years, bringing out the worst in one another. Since normal toddlers can average several episodes of misbehavior an hour, along with episodes of crying and tantrums, often once or more per day, it is essential that parents have appropriate tools for managing their own and their babies emotional states. The reader can find lots more about handling negative emotions (Key 2) and setting appropriate limits (Key 5) in How’s Your Family Really Doing?