Feeling Lost or Depressed? 6 Tips to Help You Rediscover Your Soul

Ashley burst into tears within a few moments of sitting down in my office. “I don’t know why I’m crying. I have a loving husband and two precious children. I work out a lot and I eat well–at least most of the time. I have really great girlfriends although I never get enough time with […]

6 Tips for Breaking the Blame Barrier

Hardly a day ever goes by when I don’t hear someone blaming someone for something. It is one of the most common–and one of the most frustrating patterns that confront couples and families. Blame can destroy a good marriage, wreak havoc on our friendships, and put innocent kids in the middle of their parents’ arguments. […]

10 Tips to Manage Stress More Effectively

Countless research studies have underscored how anxiety and depression correlate significantly with an individual’s sense of control or lack of control over his or her own destiny. The same thing is true when it comes to stress. In fact, given our mortality combined with our lack of control over so much of life, stress goes […]

Stressed to the Limit. No End in Sight.

“Future shock is the shattering stress and disorientation that we induce in individuals by subjecting them to too much change in too short a time.” -Alvin Toffler I received a call from a distressed mother last week asking if her whole family could come to see me. “I’m really worried,” she explained. “Every one of […]

We Are Only As Sick as Our Secrets

“Anything will give up its secrets if you love it enough. Not only have I found that when I talk to the little flower or to the little peanut they will give up their secrets, but I have found that when I silently commune with people they give up their secrets also–if you love them […]

Confronting Your Ghosts of the Past: How to Assess Your Relationship

DCF 1.0

“In every conceivable manner, the family is the link to our past, the bridge to our future.” -Alex Haley   If you were one of the lucky people, raised in a happy loving family, you’ve most likely emerged with many of the skills and strengths necessary to form lasting healthy relationships…and you are probably NOT […]

Drowning in Love: What’s Too Much of a Good Thing?

Definitions of smothering love: To express your love for someone too much; to cover someone or something completely; to insulate, to overwhelm. Parenting is one of the hardest jobs around. Especially here, especially now, in our rapidly moving, constantly changing modern world. Most parents seek out this job willingly and joyfully with the best of […]

Unhappy Relationships and Depression Go Hand in Hand

“What is the opposite of two? A lonely me. A lonely you.” -Richard Wilbur “It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.” -Friedrich Nietzsche The TV ads would have all of us believe that the best cure for depression is the latest and greatest medication. First it […]

Guidelines for Choosing the Right Therapist–Does the Shoe Fit?

I will never forget a lecture that I heard in 1973 (which says a lot since there is so much that I don’t remember). The speaker was the late David Rosenhan, Professor Emeritus, in his popular undergraduate class in Abnormal Psychology at Stanford. Each year, at the end of the term, he gave a lecture about choosing […]

7 Warning Signs Of a Troubled Marriage

I’ve been counseling couples and families for over three decades and one thing stands out. Most people wait too long before they reach out for help…years too long. Problems that might have been solved in five to ten sessions become crises that break up perfectly good relationships. Since only a precious few learned the necessary […]